Up, Up, and Awake
I made the mistake of getting on the scale already and I am sadly back up to where I was before. My body won’t give me a break. I’m really beginning to hate it. It certainly hates me.
I have carefully planned out my foods for today and tomorrow. The 15th and 16th are liquid only. I plan to follow my menu exactly for the next two days in the desperate hopes of shedding some water weight.
If I can’t do this now, I’m afraid I will only continue to gain weight. I am worried about my health.
I knew I would gain weight when I left Lowe’s. It was a very physical job, I did a lot of brisk walking. I told them I would probably gain weight, that I was concerned about it. Why couldn’t that have been taken into consideration?
It’s not like I’ve gained 20 pounds since I left there, either. Only about 6 or 7 pounds at the most. That includes the holidays.
If I try to explain it to them now it’s just going to sound like I’m making excuses for myself.
I guess it is what it is. We’ll just have to wait and see. And we won’t know until the day of. Until I’m there and getting weighed in. Hopefully it’s at the beginning of the day when I’m not full of fluid.
Also, you didn’t want to hear this, but I’m very backed up, which probably doesn’t help me at all. Even mountains of chia seeds on my oatmeal aren’t doing the trick, anymore. Seriously, my body does not want me to be successful. Everything seems to be working against me.
I am probably eating the wrong things. Cheese, more cheese, whey protein shakes…that’s all I can think of that are wrong for me. I think I’m lactose intolerant. Of course, I haven’t been drinking the shakes in the last couple of days…
They really push the whey shakes, but I know they are wrong for me. They made me so sick in 2021. Basically shut down my digestive system for three months. Even after I told them that, they were like, try the whey isolate shakes. Well, sorry, but, I don’t think there’s any difference. I think they both mess with me.
The good news is they now have plant-based protein shakes that actually taste okay. I think I’m probably going to go with those post op. If there is a post op.
I think I need to start thinking about what I’m going to do if they cancel the surgery. If I don’t have a plan for that contingency, I will almost certainly become depressed and gain more weight.
One thing I could try is two plant-based shakes per day. I lost a lot of weight before, drinking two shakes a day until I got sick, but I think it was because of the whey or the lactose or the dairy or all three.
Of course, I was also biking six days a week for 45 minutes a day. I lost 70 pounds in about seven months. I got to the point where I was really sad if I had to miss a workout.
I have been to a GI doctor, if you’re curious. Normal colonoscopy. No IBS diagnosis. She just said I needed more fiber in my diet. Well, now I have more fiber in my diet than anyone should reasonably have, and it’s doing me zero good.
Enough about that.
It seems it’s about 3 AM. This is about the time I normally get up on a weekday. So I guess I may as well get something very specific to eat and feed the cats.
